Here’s a made up fact that could be true:
91% adults would have better mental health today if their dad told them “I’m proud of you”
But…I’m brown and have kinda given up on that ever happening. So, this week, I made myself proud.Me to myself
Thing is – I had a setback last week that surprisingly affected me.
Ended up having to take my foot of the gas to make some space….and came away with something new by the end of it.
Today, I wanted to lean into that because for me- sales, startups and life are all integrated into a way of being.
Sharing my takeaways in 3…2…. – ah hang on. Before that- think I found my dad’s twitter alt account :
Anyway, back to the main thing.
This year, I’ve started to become more cognisant of where my valued actions come into conflict with emotion driven responses.
Think things like:
- pushing snooze on the alarm
- snacking more when you’d promised to do less
- texting that ex you know sucks
The best version of you knows the right thing to do but where it gets tricky is when the less-than-ideal versions of you pop up.
And when that baser version comes up, it’s usually because you’re ruminating a lot.
Here’s the thing though:
It’s taken me a year of meditating to now kinda-sorta start to become aware when I fall into loops of rumination and snap out of it.
That’s not to say you can force your mind to do anything.
The mind is that rebellious child who just doesn’t listen to authority- at least mine is.
The way you do it is by holding that child’s hand and doing a valued action, despite the ongoing discomfort.
For me, that was waking up and going to the gym first thing in the morning. I’ve worked out 5 times this week- and am going again after writing this.
The difference between days I slacked off and didn’t was massive.
Because when I did inevitably fall in the rumination trap, I had an example of a value-driven action from just a couple hours earlier.
That helped go back to doing something else that I valued like finishing my work tasks or going on a walk, instead of engaging with unhelpful thought patterns.
Looking back- productivity wise, this week was a bit of a write-off and I still feel super proud.
Which is why, I believe writing down your values, analysing (non-judgementally) when you compromise on them and holding yourself accountable is the unlock to executing at a high level.
For me, at least.
But maybe you have wholesome dads, in which case- I probably wasted 3 mins of your day.